Shot gun
by Pandora's tears
Summary: Because there aren't enough fem slash Sherlock gender swap stories! Johanna comes home to find Sherlock engaged in an act of boredom that wont tear up the walls. Rated to be safe Based off of something that happened to me recently!


"Do you know what a shotgun is?"

Johanna had just walked in through the door from the kitchen. She stared at Sherlock's lanky form, draped unnaturally over the couch, but somehow naturally for Sherlock, in a tee-shirt and pajama bottoms. Her usual dressing gown was hanging off her shoulders, fanned out below her. She was all sharp angles and dark, flyaway hair, the perfect contrast to Johanna's own form. But the study of Sherlock was nothing new to Johanna.

More surprising was the hookah dangling from Sherlock's elegant fingers.

"Sherlock... Is that a... Mushroom shaped hookah?"

The younger woman raised the pipe to her lips and proceed to breath in slowly, the glass bowl bubbling and smoking.  
Just as slowly, she blew the smoke into the air, letting some of it slip out her nose, her sharp features giving her the distinct look of a dragon.

"Yes, Johanna. Very good observation... And before you ask, no. It's only tobacco. Flavored, actually..."

Johanna sniffed as she moved closer to Sherlock and her hookah.  
"Is that why I can smell cherries and vanilla?"

Sherlock grinned and handed her the long pipe.  
"Wanna try?"

Johanna rolled her eyes as she sat on the floor next to Sherlock.  
"Sherlock, even if it smells good, that's still smoking!"

Sherlock took another long drag before she began speaking.  
"Actually, the potential health effects of hookah smoke are not the same. The chemical compositions of cigarette smoke and hookah smoke are vastly different."

Here, she flipped over onto her stomach to study the structure of the hookah, pointing to the top, glowing ember.  
" The charcoal in the modern hookah causes the tobacco mixture to be heated to a lower temperature, as opposed to the higher temperature in a cigarette where the tobacco is directly burnt. Consequently, effects of hookah smoke are expected to be very than that of a cigarette smoke."

Again, she took a deep breath of the smoke and proceeded to blow it in Johanna's face. She was tempted to cough and brush away the cloud, but it did smell good and was more of a mist than smoke.  
"Besides, overall serum CEA levels are higher than in non-smokers but substantially lower than those recorded in cigarette smokers considering the same amount of tobacco... But that's a study from those who use them frequently. . . I just remembered I had this and I could use tobacco instead of... well.."

Johanna rolled her eyes and leaned her head against the couch, watching Sherlock puff smoke rings.

"But you didn't answer my question, Jo..."

Johanna frowned. Before she had a chance to ask what the question was, Sherlock was practically in her face.  
"Do you know what a shotgun is?"

Johanna swallowed hard.  
"I imagine it has nothing to do with my gun... or the wall?"

Sherlock chuckled, managing to gracefully roll of the couch and approach Johanna on all fours.  
"Hold very still, with your mouth open slightly..."

Johanna had a feeling her mouth was already agape.

She watched, fascinated as Sherlock took a long, deep drag from the hookah. Vanilla and cherries surrounded them.  
Then Sherlock leaned into Johanna, covering her small frame with her long, thin frame. Her robe draped over both of them as Sherlock's lips gently brushed against Johanna's.  
Johanna felt her exhale the smoke into her mouth, but had little time to register how the smoke made her feel. The only thing her mind could focus on was,  
_Sherlocks' kissing me... Sherlock is practically kissing me_!

To soon, it was over. Sherlock pulled back, smiling impishly.  
Johanna tried to stay cool as she exhaled the smoke, but there was no smoke.

"I... I don't think it worked right... Did it?"

Sherlock shrugged, leaning back against the couch.  
"Doesn't always make it in the transition. It all depends on the results your after. I, myself, am very pleased..."


End file.
